“Now when a 38-year-old guy pretending to be a high school football jock is about to have sex with a cheerleader with breasts like fleshy medicine balls in a locker room that’s clearly just a one-bedroom apartment in the San Fernando Valley, and then they pause to fumble with a condom, I’ll be like, ‘Oh crap, I just realized that none of this is real! I lost my boner!'”

– me, talking about porn and condoms in my BFF Susannah Breslin’s excellent piece about porn and condoms in Forbes.